Redemption's Illusion
by Winged Dancer
Summary: A novelization of the Phantom Goldoba happenings. When all whom you love hates you, do you even deserve redemption?


* * *

**Pre-Story:** The rating is given for the same reasons that the game rating: Light cuss words every now and then and some violence. There are no pairings nor romance in this, I'm afraid. 

**Baten Kaitos: Eternal Wings and the Lost Ocean** is, of course, not of my propierty, nor am I making any money out of this. For clarifications and other stuff check the post-strory notes, please.

* * *

_Redemption's Illusion_

A _Baten Kaitos_ novelization of the Phantom Goldoba happenings by Winged Dancer.

* * *

"Where are we?" was the first thing that was said once they had boarded the strange ship that had approached them as they went through the Path of Souls. 

"This looks an _awful_ lot like the Goldoba Battleship, I believe," remarked a uniform-clad young man, turning to his companions. "I was aboard it enough times in my life to recognize it, even if does look a little bit strange." 

Kalas sighed, passing one of his hands through his sapphire-blue hair. "Yeah, does look like it, even though we saw it fall and all…" 

Next to him, a young blonde smiled. "Don't any of you remember? Catranne mentioned something about a phantom ship back at Anuenue." 

"She's right, y'know," not far behind them, Gibari readied his oar. "Maybe this ship is, how to put it, a copy from the one we found when we traveled to Mira the first time.. you know, when we first met Mizuti." 

"Ah, yes, the Great Mizuti remembers!" 

Kalas shrugged. "Who knows? The Path of Souls is weird enough to have kept memory of the ship…" 

"You're not seeing my point, Kalas," interrupted Gibari, "What I mean is that if this is like the ship we found that time, then mebby ghost Giacomo and phantom Ayme and Folon'll be 'round here." 

There was a moment of silence as Gibari's words set it, and then, almost one after another, the group readied their weapons as well, while Savyna (who had pretty much been on her guard from the day she learned to walk) walked to the nearest door to check the surroundings. 

"The bastard's dead, so I guess his ghost ain't out of the question…" Kalas tightened his grip around his dagger. "Anyway, let's move. The hole we came in through has disappeared, so let's just find the deck." 

The party nodded, following their leader. 

"But, Lyude…" Xelha whispered to the red-haired youth next to her, "Hadn't Catranne said something about this ghost ship calling for you?" 

Lyude opened his eyes for a second, as if suddenly remembering about it. "Well, I can't say I had thought of that. But really, why would the ghosts of Giacomo and his henchmen call for me? There's a much stronger connection between him and Kalas." 

"Well, yes, but there's a difference in between how "Kalas" and "Lyude" sound, don't you think? If the people say the ghost calls for Lyude…" 

He smiled a little, shifting his gun along the way. "You may be right, Xelha, but really… I don't remember knowing anyone who was aboard the Goldoba when it fell, except for Giacomo and the other two. If the ship wants anyone, it'll be Kalas, I think." 

Xelha nodded, not really convinced, but decided it wouldn't change much to insist. 

The group went down a set of stairs, arriving at a circular hallway with a bridge connecting the two sides of the room. There was nothing under it; as far as the group knew to fall down that bridge was to fall into the nothingness of the Path of Souls. 

"Fantastic…" Kalas said at the front, pointing at a dim blue light not far away from them. "Looks like the ship is cursed after all." 

Savyna raised an eyebrow. "I don't think they'll be much trouble." 

Xelha nodded, smiling. "We've found guys like these before, at the Library of Magic and at Capella, back in Dhûr." 

"Let's get goin' then!" With Gibari's rush the battle started. There weren't many spirits surrounding them, and if anything, what made things difficult was the narrow spaced they had been force to fight in. 

"These things ain't so difficult!" 

The room was illuminated by the flash of a Light Flare. "The Great Mizuti be having no problems!" 

"Kalas! To your left!" 

"No problem!" the boy blocked the upcoming attack. 

"Say… don't you think they're kinda ganging up on Lyude?" 

Kalas threw a glance over his shoulder. The red-haired boy had been cut off from the rest of them and was surrounded by three or four ghouls, but he seemed to be holding his ground. 

"He's fine," he answered Xelha, who was in the middle of the Seal of Water incantation, while attacking one of the ghosts himself, "He's just building it up for Rhapsody, I bet. It'll work wonders on these things." 

"Concentrate on your own fights!" came Savyna's voice from ahead, as she took flight to crush the skeleton's skull with her knee, "Vanish Granade!" 

If there was something annoying about ghosts, Kalas thought then, it was that they could call each the 'dead' ones back to un-life once you had killed them. It just made the battle drag on and on and it became purely annoying… behind him, Lyude was slowly but surely showing signs of exhaustion… which was strange, since Lyude had already proved a few times that his imperial training was not something to make fun of. 

Kalas would later realize that, in truth, it wasn't so much of exhaustion than it was pure fright. Things had started easy enough for Lyude and he had had no trouble finishing the first two ghosts, but as he turned to shoot the third, it came. 

"_Lyude…_" 

He had stopped, confused, and looked around to see if it was any of his teammates calling, but they all looked absorbed in their own battles. 

"_You betrayed your own nation…_" 

Slowly, he turned around to face the ghost again. It wasn't attacking; it was just… staring at him with its empty eye sockets. 

"_I can't believe you only saved yourself…_" 

More specters had begun to surround him, so he chose to ignore it and shot a few light-elemental bullets at the ghost, who moaned before completely disappearing, its voice floating in the air, nearly freezing Lyude to his spot. 

"_…you have no future…_" 

A sharp pang of pain snapped him back to reality. Four more ghosts had arrived around him, and he aimed his gun at the one that had attacked him. 

"_…Operation Sweep in Azha…_" He stopped, pale. Operation Sweep… how did the ghost know about that?! "_You didn't stop it._" 

"I-I… I tried!" he found himself answering the specter, which once again didn't attack, but just looked at him as if it was disappointed. 

"_You didn't do anything. They are dead. Because of you._" 

"_Intermezzo_!" the ghost was tore apart by the explosion, with no chance to add anything else. 

"_Lyude…_" 

His breathing was starting to quicken, and he fell cold sweat running down his brow as he pressed the cannon of his gun straight into the apparition's chest. 

"_…it's dark.... and cramped… please, help…_" the voice! He had known that voice! It – it could've been one of the boys he trained with, or one of the soldiers he commanded back when… 

No. Only ghosts, Lyude. They are playing with your mind, he told himself as he pressed the trigger. 

The ghost screeched, and finally, in a pitiful way, moaned "_Why…? Why are you doing this to me, Lyude?_" before disappearing. 

This was almost too much for him. He tripped and fell to the floor, barely dodging one of the ghostly warrior's swipes and raising his cannon to meet his assailant. 

"_Why hasn't someone saved me yet? Why? Please tell me, Lyude!!_" 

"No!!" a flurry of bullets left Lyude's gun, almost tearing apart the attacker's body. 

And yet, before disappearing, with a cynical, terrible smile, the ghost spoke: "_You must know why… you are the only one left alive among us…_" 

It took Lyude almost all of his strength to keep from hugging his knees and crying like he did when little. Even from his spot on the floor pointing the gun upwards seemed to require an incommensurable effort, and the ghouls kept coming. 

"_Operation Sweep… your fault!_" 

"_…you abandoned us, Lyude…_" 

"_Help me… Lyude… save us…_" 

"_…we are all dead, Lyude…_" 

As if far, far away, he heard the rest of the team calling, but he did not have the strength to answer. 

"_…Lyude..._" that voice had sounded almost warm… 

He looked up, but found only yet another specter. "_You are a man with a big heart, always tormented by guilt. Come here… be free…_" 

"N-no… No!! _Rhapsody_!!" 

The spirits were consumed by the surge of light, leaving their maddening voices behind. 

"_Come here… and be free…_" 

"_...you didn't do anything…_" 

"_Why… why?_" 

"_The only left alive… you, Lyude…_" 

He dropped his gun, taking his hands to his head. His eyes prickled, and a tear rolled down his cheek. 

"…How… how can I be forgiven?" he muttered to himself, "If I'm the only one left alive… What should I do? What am I supposed to do?" 

"Lyude!" 

"What're you sitting for, Lyude!" 

He raised his head, and quickly cleaned his cheek. Gibari and Mizuti were finishing the two last ghosts, Xelha was looking through her pack for a curative Magnus. 

Gibari turned to him, half-smiling. "Hey kid! Couldn't you hear me back there? I kept on callin' for you, but you didn't even turn 'round!" 

Savyna didn't seem so forgiving. Lady Death walked up to him and crossed her arms. "Hey, if you have time to sit around, find a way to get out of here… try to think hard, now that you are actually trying." 

He forced a smile and got up, dusting off his uniform. "I'm sorry. I just got a little overthrown for a moment." 

"They sure ganged up on you, buddy… you okay?" 

"Yes, I'm fine…" 

"You look a little pale, though…" Xelha sounded concerned, waving a Magnus at him. "Perhaps you are poisoned?" 

"Er, no… it's just, how to put it, didn't these phantoms strike you as… a bit different from the ones we've faced before?" 

The party seemed to think for a few instants. Kalas was the first to speak. "Nah. Pretty much the same, actually." 

Gibari nodded. "Yeah. Didn't see much difference." 

"…I see. Well then, let's hurry." 

"Are you sure you are fine?" 

"Yes, yes. Only a bit of a fright, I'm sure."

* * *

"Okay, so the known exits are all either blocked or have disappeared… perhaps if we visit the control room like we did last time, we can unlock the doors that are closed." 

"But I don't think anyone here remembers the password, Kalas… we could stay there forever trying combinations." 

"Well, what else do you propose?" 

"Xelha's right, though. We can't afford to waste time on that." 

"Aw, c'mon!" Kalas rolled his eyes. "I'm sure we can figure it out quickly enough… it was something like 0459, I'm sure." 

"We don't even know if the control room exists in this alternate Goldoba," Savyna interrupted, looking anxious. "Besides, there are a few rooms left to investigate." 

The group had been exploring the ship for a while; encountering two or three more ghosts along the way and not much else. It was, by far, a place not one of them wanted to be at, but the effect it was having on Lyude was now way too obvious to any of them to ignore (even if the boy was doing his best to appear calm and bright) and his nervousness was starting to rub on them. 

Kalas leaned against a wall. "Well, we don't even know if these rooms have windows or whatever, so it could be just as useless. At least those stupid ghosts aren't appearing anymore." 

Mizuti cocked her head up. "The Great Mizuti feels something be blocking the exit. If we find it, the exit be open for leaving." 

Xelha got up from her place. "I feel something like that as well… as if something was hiding _and_ hiding the exit at the same time." 

"Decided then!" Gibari clapped, the sound bouncing off the Goldoba's empty walls. "We check these rooms first then, and head for the control room if we find nothing. Chin up now people, we'll be outta here in no time!" 

"Three rooms to check, uh… fine." 

"I feel a little as if I was inside a horror story," Xelha giggled softly as they opened the first door. "You know… you open a door, and there's a body hanging from the ceiling and it speaks to you…" 

"And the Ice Queen reads _that_ kind of books…?" 

"Well, every now and then…!" 

"Well, sorry to disappoint your Majesty, but no corpse here," Gibari laughed. 

The room seemed to be just an empty bedroom, big enough to house at the very least thirty or forty shoulders. 

"That be a relief! The Great Mizuti prefers beds over corpses." 

Lyude laughed a little at the conversation. "Indeed! That's the most… norm…" 

Everything had gone black. It was the blackness and him, standing in the middle of it. He looked around wildly, searching for his friends, but saw nothing of them. 

In front of him something appeared, slowly taking shape. 

"_So,_" the shape said, "_The traitor finally returns…_" 

The boy gasped; the shape had become clearer now and he could recognize the face of his old Imperial Commander, the man under whom he had worked for years, the man who had trained him and helped him get accustomed to the military life… 

But the eyes the Commander looked at him with held no nostalgia nor any kindness. "_Look at what's happened. Take a good look at what's become of the empire. This is all your fault. You betrayed us all. The darkness took us all…_" 

Anger rose from the bottom of his stomach. "No! It wasn't my fault!" 

The man shook his head, sadly. "_Whether you admit it or not, you played a role in ruining your homeland… You will bear this badge of shame for the rest of your life…_" the spirit pointed at him. "_Everyone knows you are a traitor and a coward!_" 

Lyude could not believe his ears. Didn't he understand that they were all being manipulated by Geldoblame? And even worse, that the Emperor himself had been nothing but a play-toy for a girl younger than them all? 

"How… how dare you!" he shouted at the ghost, "I would never hope for the destruction of my homeland. _Never_!" 

But the commander smiled, sardonic. "_Your hopes are irrelevant. It has already happened…_" and his commander faded before he could add anything else. 

Around him his surroundings became solid again, a hand suddenly dropping on his shoulder. He turned around to face the very concerned faces of his teammates. 

"Hey, Lyude…" Kalas, the one who had taken hold of his shoulder, asked, "What were you uh, mumbling about?" 

Lyude blinked, half blinded by the return of the light and half confused about the question. "Huh? Didn't you… didn't you hear the voice?!" 

Gibari raised an eyebrow. "The voice? …I didn't hear anything. Anyone fear a voice?" 

The rest of the group shook their heads. 

"That means… only I heard it speak? But how?" the boy took a hand to his forehead. "Didn't any of you, perchance, see a… an old friend, or an acquaintance of yours?" 

Again they shook their heads. 

With a hand under her chin, Mizuti managed to look pensive even with her mask on. "The Great Mizuti feels strange spirits swirling around. This place be spooky." 

"I agree…" Xelha hugged herself, as if she was suddenly cold. "We should leave as soon as possible." 

Heading for the door, Savyna looked at them over her shoulder. "I second that, but will they let us leave?" 

Lyude said nothing, but held the impression that no, they wouldn't. 

"Well, one down, two to go then… lets check that room over there," Kalas pointed to a door around the middle of the highway. 

The sounds of their footsteps sounded hollow and bounced off the walls as they walked towards the center room. Every now and then Lyude felt as if someone was watching him, or at least someone besides the rest of the group. 

What he didn't understand was why him, why _only_ him. In the world where they lived it wasn't such an strange thing to find ghosts and creatures that played with their prey, drove it insane and then devoured it… 

So why only him? Whatever it was that lived in the boat, why wasn't it affecting the minds of the others? 

The only solution he could think of is that this was no mind-altering creature; that he had really found the ghosts of his ex-companions, the ghost of his tutor… 

…and they hated him. 

"Looks empty." Gibari's voice shook him out of his thoughts. 

The room they were at now was wide and empty. Lyude looked around it, half expecting (and completely dreading) to see even more spirits waiting to torture him. 

"I think this was the hangar," he said with a drop of relief in his voice. "Perhaps you'll remember, when we were forced to leave the Goldoba?" 

"Ah, yes!" Xelha's eyes lit up. "We took an escape pod and landed near Azha Village…" 

An uncomfortable silence fell on them. Both Azha Village and the Fire Caves were topics not usually touched upon… Savyna and Lyude tended to tense up at the mention of Azha, and the Fire Caves brought bad memories back to everyone. 

"Well, it's empty, meanin' we should go ahead and check the last one," again it was Gibari the one to break the silence. 

"Yeah, no sense in stayin' here…" 

"The sooner we leave this ship the better, too." 

One more room then, thought Lyude. With a little bit of luck, they'd find the exit or a clue to find it, and they'd be able to leave that Gods-forsaken ship. 

"Mmmh… looks like an ammunition cupboard this time…" 

Kalas snorted. "Trust the Empire to make a cupboard the size of my house." 

"Well, I expect they need more ammo than you, Kalas." 

"Maybe, but there's nothing here. Let's just go to the control room already." 

"Yes. The exit does not be here." 

"You win, kid, you win. Let's get going then… Lyude! You coming or what?!" 

"Oh, not again… Lyude, please!" 

The redheaded was rooted to his spot, open-mouthed and completely pale. 

"Sk-…" he started, but didn't continue. 

"Lyude! Can't you hear us??" 

He couldn't. Lyude was again surrounded by nothingness, and in front of him his brother had taken form, and the way the ghost was looking at him clearly said it didn't think his younger brother was any better than dirt. 

"_The long and glorious history of our family is no more,_" the ghost started, "_All thanks to you, Lyude…_" 

"Skeed!" Lyude cried, surprised. 

A second form appeared next to Skeed. "_You must be proud of yourself…_" it said, in a feminine voice. "_Proud to have extracted revenge…_" 

The shape was now clear. "Vallye…" his brother and sister… how could he have not known they were dead? After leaving Mintaka, he had had no chance to investigate what had been of them, what with trying to save Kalas and all… 

No. He had no excuse. What was left of his family was gone, and he hadn't even taken into consideration that they might not have survived Melodia's take over. 

"_You always hated us… our family…_" Vallye's ghost continued, with no mercy. "_You hated us all, deep down in your soul…_" 

"That's… That's not true! Why would I hate you?" he cried, not knowing whether he was angry or desperate. Not even after they had killed Almarde had he hated them; he just couldn't find it in himself to hate someone who held such a strong connection with him. 

But his brother sneered at his outburst, "_Why indeed? Don't play innocent, Lyude…_" Skeed's eyes hardened, "_We hated you… we despised you… of course you knew that, didn't you?_" 

"_Don't pretend like you never knew, Lyude…_" Vallye followed, "_We never cared about you… not in the least._" 

Skeed stepped closer, "_Because…_" 

His sister followed suit, hate in her eyes, and he had nowhere to back to. "_Because…_" 

"_You didn't deserve to be loved._" the two siblings joined their voices in a sentence that hurt more than any other attack he had ever received. 

"No!!" he launched forward, trying to take hold of his brother, but his hand passed through. "I.... I tried! I wanted your love!" he turned to Vallye, desperate. "I did my utmost to earn it!" 

"_No more excuses Lyude…_" Skeed's form was beginning to fade. 

"_Yes, what you did to us speaks for itself._" Vallye, too was starting to disappear. 

"No! That's not true!" he tried once more to rush towards them, but it was as if something was holding him back. "I really… Oh, why did it ever come to this?!" 

As his remaining family disappeared, he found himself standing once more among his companions, Kalas holding his shoulders from behind. 

"Hey, Lyude?! What's wrong with you?! Take it easy!" 

Lyude blinked a few times, as if coming out of a trance. "A-argh?!" at this point, his knees gave out and the redheaded collapsed to the floor, covering his head with his arms. 

"I tried… I tried…" he muttered. 

"This is bad. He's losing it," Gibari whispered to the others while the young man rocked himself back and forth. "What's happening here?" 

Savyna sighed, massaging her forehead. "We have no choice. We have to move forward." 

Xelha nodded, her gaze glued to the sobbing figure on the floor, who kept repeating 'I tried… I tried…' every now and then, as if chanting a mantra of sorts. "Yes, we have to find an exit…" 

"The Great Mizuti feels something malicious. It be trying to spook Lyude. If we find it, Lyude be free and we can go." 

"If we find it, I'll give it the beating of its life…" Kalas grunted, taking his dagger out of its sheet. "It's never nice to see a friend about to go crazy." 

"Come now, Lyude… let's get out of this place." Xelha and Gibari tried to help the young man to his feet. He looked up at them, pale and with a confused look on his face, but refused to be helped and got up on his own, not saying anything and going for the exit.

* * *

His own brother and sister hated him. Even in death they would not love him. Could it be that he really was unworthy of their love? Part of him refused to believe that; part of him said that all had been a mere illusion and that he was not to heed the ghosts' words… 

…but it was becoming difficult to believe that. 

"Let's cut through the bridge and head for the control room," Lyude heard Kalas' voice as if it was at the other side of a long, long tunnel. "I don't think we have much time, really…" 

He suddenly felt like laughing; he was in such a strange state of mind. He was aware of his companions standing next to him, yet he felt them far away, he knew that they were worried about him and yet that thought sounded ridiculous, like a complete waste of time. 

But Lyude's nascent smile was frozen as he saw, floating over the emptiness under the bridge, the form of his nanny, the woman that had brought him up, Almarde. 

He could not keep walking, and once again his knees failed him and he fell to the floor. 

"Oh no… it can't be?!" he cried, now completely unaware of his friends fussing around him; calling his name, pleading him to get a grip and resist. "Stop it…" he continued, a prayer to whoever was listening, "Just stop it, please!" 

But the spirit ignored his plea. "_Lyude… why didn't you help me? Why did you abandon me, and flee?_" 

He had no strength to answer. 

"_I had always been there for you, stayed by your side, watched over you…_" 

He shook his head. "Stop… this is too much! I can't bear it!!" 

"_You didn't help me…_" Almarde's voice was breaking what little hope he had left. "_You don't love me… or anyone… not ever the ones that loved you…_" 

"No! That's not true!" so he said, but he could not bring himself to believe it. 

Almarde's ghost smiled, and her voice grew and entered every fiber of his being, burning itself into his soul. "_You have no right to be loved by anyone… or to love anyone… isn't that so, Lyude?_"

* * *

"We have to carry him away, _now_!" Kalas nearly screamed, he and Gibari supporting Lyude's limp body. "This is just getting worse as times passes!!" 

"We don't know what's happening with his spirit, Kalas! If it's been trapped and we take the body, we'd lose Lyude forever!" 

"…too much… I can't bear it…" the redheaded muttered, falling into silence immediately afterwards. 

"I dunno about spirits, Xelha, but if we don't hurry Lyude's just gonna snap, and then it'll be good-bye him all the same!" Gibari interceded. 

Mizuti shook her head, siding with Xelha here. "The Great Mizuti believes we should stay. If Lyude's soul be snared, Lyude will die." 

"I agree with them on this one," Savyna crossed her arms. "As much as I want to leave, this is a battle he has to win on his own." 

"Aw, c'mon! Lyude! Y'hear me?" Kalas practically shouted into the boy's ear, "I bet you wanna leave, don't you? Get away from this stupid ship?" 

"…Yes… you're right…" the redheaded muttered, seemingly as an answer. 

"See? He wants to go as well! Its boys versus girls now!" 

But Lyude's strangely firm and strong voice interrupted him. "I have no right to be loved… I have no right to love another…" 

"…he's not agreeing! He's still in trance!" 

"He's – he's just being over-dramatic! If we don't – hey!!" 

Lyude had gotten up, raising a hand towards the empty void in front of them. "The only answer… to my question…" 

Before they could stop him, he had started walking towards the drop.

* * *

"_You have no right to be loved by anyone… or to love anyone… isn't that so, Lyude?_" 

Now he saw it, now he had finally understood what the truth was. "Yes… you're right," he accepted sadly, "I have no right to be loved… I have no right to love another…" 

Almarde's voice continued, echoing all around him. "_You betrayed your country, and left your family, you watched the ones that loved you die…_" all that; truth and nothing else for him. "_How are you going to live with yourself, Lyude? What hope could you have left in your shameful life?_" 

He could feel his cheeks now wet with tears, but forced his voice to go on. "I… I no longer know… what should I do? How could I possibly go on?!" 

And Almarde smiled, even if a mere grin, but it looked more warm than anything he had seen since arriving at the boat. "_Come…_" she extended an arm towards him, "_I will ease your burden… You will be happy… come… come with us… for that is the only answer to your question._" 

He stood up, his gaze not leaving Almarde, and reached out his hand as well. "The only answer… to my question…" Lyude started to walk towards the apparition. 

"_Lyude, answers are not to be given… You must find them yourself…_"

He stopped brusquely. "That voice?!" That voice! It was… different, oh so different from the rest of the voices that had tormented him since he had stepped into this forsaken ship… it was warm, it was full of light, full of hope, full of love… 

…it was Almarde's voice, back in his childhood… 

…it was his father's voice, when he was but a boy… 

…it was the voice of the people he had loved and had loved him… 

"_To find the right answer, you first have to find the right question. _

Remember, always see with unclouded eyes…" 

"See… with unclouded eyes…" he repeated, slowly. 

"_Wisdom comes from having an answer ready…_"

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, enjoying the calm feeling that was spreading through his body. "Yes, wisdom comes from having an answer ready, when you ask yourself the question…" 

And the blackness surrounding him was erased by a blinding flash of light, and he found himself sitting in a wide green field, with Almarde standing next to him. The wind was blowing softly through his hair, and it was all so peaceful that he thought he could stay there forever. 

He looked around, taking in the colors that surrounded him and smiling softly. "Answers are not to be given… one must find the right question… the right question…" 

What was his question before? 

'What should I do?' 'How could I possibly go on?' And the question the spirit had asked… 'What hope could I have left in my life?' 

He hugged his knees, still smiling. There was hope, for there was love. Even if the ones who had already passed on didn't understand it, everything he had done had been because of love… 

He had left the Empire because it was rotten at its core and because if left alone it would hurt the ones he loved the most. He hadn't wished for his family's death, but to just sit and allow Geldoblame and Melodia's ambitions to corrode the world was something he wouldn't be able to do. 

That was the truth, and that was what mattered. He knew it now in his heart and knew that now that he had found such feeling, he had to go on… for the sake of the people that were left behind and for the sake of the ones that still remained on the face of the world. 

"Almarde…" he turned to his old nanny, and smiled at her. To think he had not seen the answer, when it had been with him for so long! "You know, I never told you, but I always thought of you as…" 

The old woman looked at him and said nothing, but the starts of a smile appeared on her lips. 

Once again everything turned white, and Lyude found himself standing on the Goldoba's bridge, Gibari and Kalas holding him back and the fake Almarde still floating before him. 

He closed his eyes. "Yes…the answer was there, all along…" 

"Lyude! Wake up already!" Gibari's voice thundered behind him, but he paid no heed, instead letting his arm fall down to his side, and opened his eyes. 

He had not felt so sure about a decision for a long time. "I wont join you." 

The fake Almarde took her hands to her face, as if contorted by pain. "_Arrrghhh… You!!_" it screamed, and then disappeared. 

A hole appeared in the darkness above them, and from it emerged a grotesque worm, moving wildly. 

Seeing that Lyude was finally back with them, Kalas and Gibari released their grip on the boy and stepped back. 

"Huh? What's going on?!" the blue-haired boy exclaimed, caught off-guard by the worm. "What the hell is this thing?!" 

"It be feeding on the pain of others!" Mizuti cried from the back line. 

Lyude took a few steps back, covering his face with one hand and reading his gun with the other. "The feelings of guilt, deep inside me… all the regrets, all the sorrow…" he pointed his weapon at the monster. "That is what feeds this abomination!" 

Xelha gasped. "A mind parasite? It must have come here from another dimension when Cor Hydrae appeared." 

Gibari readied himself to fight. "You slimy excuse for a worm!" 

"We can take it!" yelled Savyna, her guard already up. 

"Of course we can! Just watch for the hole, everyone – start!!" 

Kalas had barely said that when the beams of two Light Flares passed to his sides, from Mizuti and Xelha in the back. The beast shrieked in pain and counter-attacked what it had closer – Lyude jumped back, and Gibari was forced to parry the worm's claw. 

Kalas took this chance to slice its upper arm, and a series of yells close by indicated that Savyna had started to attack as well. The parasite shook her off and immediately turned towards the woman, firing a beam that caught her in mid-body. 

Xelha stopped at the middle of a spell, "Savyna! You al – " 

"I'm fine! You look out!" 

The blonde looked up to see the beast now aiming for her, but it's aim was forced off by a string of bullets that hit the worm's head. 

Lyude was crouching on the floor, looking (as Kalas would say later) completely pissed. "If you want to attack something why don't you try to come after me, you despicable insect! I thought it was me the one you wanted!" he added, shooting a series of heavy projectiles at the worm. 

"Now, Gibari! Xelha, Mizuti – you keep it entertained!" 

"Roger!" 

"It be no match for the Great Mizuti!" 

Blue and green light flew from the girls and hit the parasite while Kalas and Gibari flew over to its head, the first cleaving a knife into the parasite head and the second landing a blow that would have killed a lesser creature. 

The worm fell to the floor now and, In what seemed one last effort, began to fire its beam around, hitting the ship mostly – the whole structure began to tremble. 

"Damn!! It'll tear this place apart!" Gibari huffed, jumping off the beast. 

"We have to hurry it up, then!" 

"_Sforzando!!_" Kalas looked around to see the redheaded dodging the beams of light and jumping over the parasite's head, pounding at its skull even before he had landed. 

"What the hell's he doing…" Kalas muttered, flying away from the worm. 

Savyna had apparently realized the same thing he had. "Boy! If you stay there, it'll drag you when it falls!" 

The redheaded landed one last blow, "Raaaaargh!!" and the worm stopped moving, quickly slipping down to the darkness. Kalas dived in and took hold of his friend by an arm, dragging him to land. 

"Calm down, will ya?! It was more dead than alive already!" 

Lyude was panting, and said nothing. He looked upwards – when the worm had been, a radiant light was shining. The Imperial Commander, Skeed, Vallye and Almarde's ghosts were standing there. He could not see very well, but he could've sworn they were smiling. 

And so he smiled as well, even if in a rather bitter-sweet way. "Thank you… for everything…" 

The ghosts looked at him some more, and then Almarde smiled and they vanished. A weight was lifted from his shoulders. 

"Lyude – not again! You with us?" 

"Ah – yes, sorry." 

"No time for that!" Savyna pointed upwards. 

"I see the exit!" Kalas called, "Let's get outta this creepy joint." 

"The parasite must've opened with its beams!" Xelha cried, smiling. 

"I hear ya, kid," Gibari patted Lyude on the back. "Let's go."

* * *

"Quite the experience, uh?" 

"You've said it, boy!" 

"One I would rather not repeat." 

"I thought you liked horror stories, Xelha?" 

"Aw Kalas, stop it…!" 

The two teens laughed softly. "But, really…" Xelha lowered her voice. "Do you all think Lyude'll be fine?" 

The group looked at the boy, who was standing apart, looking at the falling Phantom Goldoba. 

"I dunno…" Kalas sighed. "Whatever it was he saw or heard, it seemed to be pretty rough on him…" 

Savyna smiled just a little. "He escaped on his own already. He'll be fine." 

Gibari nodded. "As she says. He'll get over it, and with time he might tell us what was it. Don't ya worry, he's pretty strong, all in all." 

Xelha smiled. "Yes, I know. I guess time will tell." 

Lyude's gaze never lost track of the destroyed ship, and when it finally disappeared in the colors that was the Path of Souls, he sat and reclined on one of the White Dragon's fins, deep in thought, and said nothing until they arrived at Mira.

* * *

**Notes:** Whoo! Don't you love it when inspiration hits and you just have to write? 

Well, anyway, this could very well be the first Baten Kaitos fanfiction on the net… if it wasn't because it's not really a fanfic, but a novelization. I can't help it, you see – Lyude's my favorite character and what happens in the Phantom Goldoba was too "OMG ANGST!!! ( " to pass. 

I took a little liberties with the script, of course – I added dialogue for the rest of the cast, as well as actions, and condensed the ghosts that are all over the ship into one battle. I also wrote most of Lyude's thoughts and decisions… I hope no-one will mind, but it might have been a little too much dramatic. Also, writing fights is not my Forte… so I apologize if the battles were a bit too wooden. 

At any rate, I hope you enjoyed reading it… any comments will be useful, and if you catch any spelling/grammar mistakes or incorrect word usage, _please_ tell me. It'll help me improve my English, you see. 

Thanks for reading! 

_WDR_


End file.
